Ink and Flow

Fair warning: today’s post is a little off our normal DIY/home improvement focus. But if things like social psychology and tattoos are interesting to you, read on!

I confess, I’m a wee bit self-involved. I spend a not-insignificant time thinking about me — my strengths, my weaknesses, what conditions help me be at my best, when am I at my worst, what motivates me, what do I want to do with my life, what’s my purpose in the world, and all the other fun questions that leave one questioning their place in the universe. And every once in awhile I come across frameworks and ideas that help fit together a few more pieces of the puzzle — yes we’re all totally unique beings, but there are a lot of systemic explanations for why we operate in the unique ways that we do. Myers-Briggs, the work of David Keirsey, and Susan Cain’s Quiet have all been powerful for me in recent years.

I’m not quite ready to delve into a blog post about those concepts and what they’ve meant for me, but today I thought I would share about another idea that has come to mean a lot to me in the past few years: the concept of “flow.” According to social psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, “flow” is a state of being where you’re fully immersed, fully engaged, fully challenged in what you’re doing — you’re “completely involved in an activity for its own sake. The ego falls away. Time flies…Your whole being is involved, and you’re using your skills to the utmost.”

It’s an idea that many are already familiar with by different names or by no name at all. Athletes describe themselves as “in the zone,” and as a runner I definitely identify with that concept. I recently watched a documentary about a magician who would sit and shuffle cards for hours in an almost hypnotic state, fully relaxed and yet fully engaged. That’s flow. Maybe it’s a broader definition of what most of us call “passions.”

Ultimately, flow isn’t about the outcome but about the experience itself. DIY is a perfect example of flow — Naomi and I aren’t doing it simply because it’s a cheaper (sometimes…) way to improve our homes, it’s because we enjoy the challenge and reward of dreaming, creating, and puzzling through problems.

Challenge — matched by the ability to conquer the challenge — is a crucial part of flow.

But what I love about the idea of “flow” is that it’s not just about hobbies, but applies to what we do in the workplace as well. I’ve spent a great deal of time in the past few years thinking about what I want from my career — what activities I want to be doing, what kind of organization I want to work for, how I want my job to fit alongside my personal life — and the concept of “flow” gives me a framework for thinking about these questions that goes far beyond the more trite (and highly privileged) “do what you love.”

It’s not about “work never feeling like work” — an aspiration unachievable for many of us — it’s about identifying the activities that engage you and finding ways to incorporate them more into your life and work. Csikszentmihalyi posits that we’re happier and more productive when we’re engaged in flow activities. We can’t choose to only do things that put us in a flow state — most of us have responsibilities in work and life that take us far out of flow. But if we’re truly more fulfilled when we’re doing certain things, then I think we owe it to ourselves to discover those things and make time for them in our lives. I think that’s doable for most of us, even those who don’t have the luxury of turning their greatest passions into a paying career.

I find flow when I’m running, when I’m working on my house, when I’m writing, and when I’m playing with lists, calendars, excel spreadsheets, and other processes to put order around chaos. I’ve found different ways to incorporate each of these into my life, whether it be at work or outside of it. But flow is also about new challenges and growth, and so I hope that I will always be finding new passions and building them into my career and personal life.

So that was the part about flow. Now comes the part about tattoos.

I have two of them. One is on my back, and this post isn’t about that one. If I ever do a post about my love for Lord of the Rings, maybe I’ll share about that first tattoo (yes, it’s Lord of the Rings related). The other one is on my wrist, and it should be pretty obvious why it’s relevant to this post:

I got my first tattoo when I was 19, and the second one was a much more recent addition within the last year. I’d been thinking for a long time about getting another one, and a few years ago started to play around with the idea of flow and how to incorporate that into a tattoo. I considered trying to create a symbol of some sort that would represent the concept, but ultimately decided to be totally literal with it and just write out the word. I’m so creative.

I also considered multiple locations, at first thinking I would do it on my side or somewhere else not very visible. But as I really thought about why I wanted to get this word tattooed on my body, I knew that it needed to be somewhere I could easily see it. The point of it is to remind me to seek flow in my work and in my life. It’s too easy to fall into what’s comfortable or right in front me or most lucrative — but I owe it to myself, and the immense privileges I’ve been afforded, to do my best to find those activities that challenge and engage me and build them into my life. So I picked the inside of my wrist, where I can easily see it when I need encouragement in the face of challenge or frustration or — most dangerous — apathy.

I originally planned to have a close friend come with me when I got it (I’d gone with her to get her most recent tattoo), but when I went to the tattoo parlor to make an appointment, they offered to do it right then and there. Since at its core this is a tattoo about inner motivation, it felt right to be there getting it done alone. Plus it only took about 15 minutes.

So those are my musings about flow and ink and life and work. What do you think, is “flow” a concept that resonates with you? What ideas and philosophies help you think about the world and better understand yourself? Any fun tattoo stories to share?

 

(Sharing at Weekend Retreat Link Party)